Okay, so yesterday I had this dumb idea stuck in my head – what if I tied my old phone to a bunch of helium balloons to take bird’s-eye view pictures? Like a poor man’s drone, right? Grabbed those leftover party balloons from my kid’s birthday last month first thing this morning.
Stuff I Scrounged Up
- 6 helium balloons (half were kinda deflated already)
- Fishing line from garage
- Cracked iPhone 8 with busted battery
- Cheap plastic basket from strawberries
- Duct tape – obviously
Started by blowing up the balloons with a tank I rented at Party City. Note to self: helium smells weird and makes you sound like a chipmunk. Taped the phone facing downward inside that flimsy basket, then tied all balloon strings to the basket handles with fishing line knots. Already looked like a toddler’s science project.
Field Test Disaster
Took it to the backyard around noon. Wind was gusting like crazy – shoulda checked the weather app. Released it slow… and whoosh! Those balloons shot up way faster than I thought. Phone started spinning like a lunatic, balloons tangled immediately. Got maybe 12 seconds of shaky footage showing mostly sky and part of my neighbor’s roof before the fishing line snapped at about tree-top height.
Whole rig sailed right over Mrs. Henderson’s house across the street. Heard balloons popping – probably her rose bushes. Spent 45 minutes knocking on doors down the block. Found the basket in a gutter, phone completely dead with a new crack. Balloons? Gone forever. Felt like an idiot carrying that soggy basket home.
Lessons Learned
- Balloons fly way faster with helium than birthday party videos show
- Fishing line snaps easier than dental floss
- Old iPhones won’t survive concrete gutters
- Mrs. Henderson hates unexpected yard decorations
Total cost? $15 helium tank rental, one dead phone, and my dignity. Worth it for that 12 seconds of wonky footage though – might make a cool screensaver if you like blurred power lines.